Ask Tia Juana

     Tia Juana will cheerfully provide advice for anyone that asks.  Just mail your questions to “Ask Tia Juana” at PO Box 8, Van Horn, Texas 79855.  All questions will remain anonymous unless there is a chance for extortion.  Disclaimer:  Tia Juana is not a licensed counselor or therapist and none of the advice should be considered professional.

Dear Tia,

Before I get arrested for stuffing a sock in my wife’s mouth, I am begging for your advice.  We have been married for more than 25 years, and you would think that she would know me and my habits by now.  I like to drink my coffee, read and watch the news and wake up gradually without having to engage in endless conversation.  My wife, on the other hand wakes up talking and goes to bed talking; nonstop!  So every morning, we go through the same routine; me trying to listen to the news, and her asking about the news, then us fighting because I can’t hear the news.  How can I get her to let me wake up before engaging in meaningful conversation, or is it too late?

Please shut up

Dear Please,

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but after 25 years, if she doesn’t know that you like to decompress without talking, it’s not going to happen.  You should appreciate that you two can still have a conversation when so often couples no longer find anything to talk about and meals are eaten in silence.  You can always find news on the radio or online, so make time for what matters, human contact.

voicing some compassion for their cold or allergy problem and offer them some Kleenex.  Set an example by excusing yourself from the table to blow your nose in the hopes that the sniffler will take the hint.  Good luck!